Everyone knows my emotions are on high alert with this pregnancy, I tend to cry at commercials or just for no reason. The majority of the tears are very happy tears, some are attached to anxiety which is normal when expecting another little one. I always like to look back at my sob sessions and figure out what triggored it and no longer feel bad for the outbursts but to embrace it...here i go!
Yesterday I was in a reflecting mood. My husband gave me an hour to myself and took Jack to Gander Mountain while I could get some sewing done and push orders out the door (success!). I dont know what came over me but the silence that filled the house made me cry. It make me realize just how important these two people are in my life and how without them, my life just wouldn't work. I've been looking at how my life has changed over the past two years (Jack will be 2 on Sunday!) and cannot imagine things any different. My husband and I are closer than ever and continue to celebrate "getting through" the first years of parenthood as a happy couple. We look back at all the little things and laugh at them and anticipate many more memories to be made when our daughter Bailey is born in May.
My logic behind all this reflection has to be because I am a big movie buff and just read about all the films being nominated for awards this year. I always like to take the time to watch each individual movie but the one I am dreading is Rabbit Hole with Nicole Kidman. It's about a couple that struggles with the coping of losing their son, something I never want to imagine living with. I know I will watch the movie but will probably wait until my crying spells are few and far between.
I always tell people that are nervous and have anxiety when having a child that with the bad (and there is a lot of bad days and experiences) come twice the good. The good will always outweigh the bad and no matter how you handle a situation, you will learn something from it. Parenthood is trial and error and every day is different. Once you begin finding toys in odd places, you tend to forget about the trantrums and sleepless nights that just occurred...and end your day with a smile (after throwing Barney off your bed).